You Gotta Have Faith.

last night i couldn't sleep.
after another long, hard conversation;
i slammed my phone in the charger, plugged my ears from the world,
and laid my head against the tiger,
just wishing that tomorrow could be a better day.

i did not get the rest that i so much needed,
that i so much deserved.

it's been only two weeks, but i feel like it's been months.
you're like Peter Pan's shadow, running away when you should be tucked under my feet.
i'm trying so desperately to catch you, but you keep slipping out of my grasp.

i can't be the only one chasing.

i want the world in my hands
i hate the beach
but i stand in california with my toes in the sand
use the sleeves on my sweater

let's have an adventure

you keep thinking none of this fazes me,
the distance.
the confusion.
the torture of love.

but i'm not as strong-willed as you think i am.
i still run rivers at night.

i imagine sitting here in bed, like i am now,
and i turn to look out the window to see you on the ground, there, waiting for me.
smiling with your snapback and your flannel.
and i jump, throwing everything that was in my lap to the side,
snatching keys, flipping doors open,
running so fast that i almost trip down the stairs.
and as the door automatically lets me through,
i pause,
so i can look at you.
and within seconds, i'm in your arms.
and we're together.

and if i may take your breath away
i don't mind if there's not much to say
sometimes the silence guards your mind
so move to a place far away

the goosebumps start race
the minute that my left hand meets your waist
and then i watched your face

see, that's the difference between you and me.
i'm not picturing a moment with you gone.
that thought replays in my head everyday,
because i believe that it will happen.

like i said before,
being able to kiss you,
hold your hand,
play with your hair,
jump on your back for a piggy-back ride,
wrestle with you,
talk to you,
whisper things to you;
that's what excites me.
that i'm able to, again and again,
be able to do that next time i see you.

that's what keeps me standing.
that's what helps me when i get upset,
or when i miss you.

you are here, stuck in my head,
never leaving, never ceasing,
and i know that's not just because of love.

it's because of friendship.
it's because of standing by,
every day, just there if i ever needed you.
you did that for four years.

i can't thank you enough for that.

it's too cold whoa
for you here
and now
so let me hold whoa
both your hands in the holes of my sweater

it'll all get better.
time is just a necessity.
you'll find your place in coffee central,
and i'll find mine with all the weirdos and Giant's fans.
but what connects us isn't conversation or calls or texts,
it's love.
it's thought.
and it's faith.

so have faith in me, and i'll have faith in you.
and if we do that,
nothing in this world will ever stop us.