Unknown.

i'm not quite sure what to talk about today.
what's been going on just seems too generic.
i mean, my posting shouldn't just be what's happening,
like an answer to a "what did you do today?"
or a redundant answer to "how are you".
"good, you?"
"good".

it's the same thing over and over again.
and i don't like to be the same.
or to repeat myself.

the love of my life is coming home today.
that's something to report.
or the fact that finals are in two weeks,
and i still have yet to prepare.

i feel like the climatic scene of this year still hasn't come to pass.
not something that i find myself proud in anyhow.
there have been significant events,
just no accomplishments to go with them.

i mean, yes, finishing the first semester of college seems like an achievement,
some award that i should be given,
saying "yay, you did it!" and i would grin and hold it up in the air,
for everyone to see.

but there should be no trophies for simply doing homework and taking tests.
especially when it didn't seem that difficult.
trophies should be earned, not just tossed to you for being "good".
when i answer the "how are you" question,
i want to give that person an essay of answers.
not just the generic or the mundane.
i do not simply want to be average.

i want to be more than that.
i want to enjoy my life, see the things that most people do not,
follow the rabbit hole into the unknown,
and be able to use less muscles in my face than i have to.
"did you know that you use less muscles to smile than to frown?"

so why does my face like to over-exert itself?

i feel like exploration is the easiest answer to this issue.
people always have the most enjoyment when discovering new things.
gives them a sense of purpose.
something that states, "hey, this is why you're here."

i don't know where i wanna go.
i don't know what i want to do.
i'm not even sure why i'm here.

but the only way to figure out those questions.
is to step out,
and follow something unfamiliar.
to take a step,
into the unknown.