New Eyes.

my mind really doesn't seem to comprehend the events prior until you realize you don't want to remember.
i had a conversation a day or two ago about what it's like to have memories.
to remember the good times.
or the bad.
i honestly think that if you can't remember things, it's not because your mind can't store the past. it's probably because there is one memory you try your hardest to forget; and in that struggle everything else slips by.

sometimes i wish i didn't have the best memory.

but then i don't think i could handle forgetting what has happened.
how i feel.

remembering the good memories is what keeps me from breaking down from the bad.
i just hate that i couldn't make the best of the end.
i'm going to miss the inspiration i got.
the source of confidence i had gained; one that pushed me to do things that made me feel alive.
feelings that seem to make me whole.
it'll be weird to not have that around with me.
but i'll still have it in my mind.

i'm not sure if i'll miss the person more, or the inspiration emerging from them.
i guess it's both.
and they are probably going to read this. but i honestly don't care.

i've had the most interesting summer.
and i think that what i've gained..
is a new perspective.

"change is scary. but instead of cowering about it, we move forward. and maybe, it'll change us for the better."

with love and light,
eve morgan